My Heart is a Stable

When I think of Advent, I think of Vienna, Austria, in 1998.  My family and I traveled with our church choir for an Advent singing trip (BC - before I was Catholic).

Above you can see the family in Vienna (I have the dumb hat on) standing in front of a giant advent wreath!  The spirit of Christmas was alive and well in Vienna.  The windows of the city hall were each a door of an advent calendar, and were changed to reflect changes each day.  Lights, garland, carolers, musicians, and Christmas markets flooded the streets at Stephansplatz and beyond.  To me, it was sort of a fairytale memory.  Outdoor markets lit by Christmas lights, freezing cold but loving every moment, strolling musicians, drinking hot spiced wine out of mugs as we walked along, the hustle and bustle...all to the backdrop of St. Stephan's Cathedral.

As a non-Catholic who didn't know, at the time, she would be seeing Pope JPII two months from this day and be in RCIA in less from a year from this time, I appreciated the beauty and sacredness of this site immediately.  I was in awe.  The original church was built in 1147, and the idea that people have been worshipping in this spot for so many years touched my heart.  And, the music nerd in me totally geeked out since Mozart was married here and his funeral was here.  Nerd alert.

Austria did an amazing job of reminding everyone to prepare.

What does that mean, exactly?  There were visible signs, reminders, that God was coming.  When I think of Advent, I think of this preparation.  Signs were all around me, reminding me the purpose for the season.  I wish there were more signs around St. Louis like this, but there are more important ways to prepare as well.

Last week, I did a mini-bible study with my 6th grade PSR students (they are great!).  We looked up verses regarding advent and the coming of Christ.  What can you do to prepare?  Our class found that prayer, the Sacrament of Reconciliation, and the idea that it is better to give than to receive are key concepts.  I also found this site about Catholic Traditions interesting, and I learned a few new things!

As we prepare our hearts, O come Emmanuel and use my heart as your manger.

My Heart is a Stable {Song}

Summa-time

I don't think I've mentioned this year how I'm now officially done with work for the entire summer!  Well, about 8 weeks.  This is one of the main reasons I remain employed by a school district over other options because, let's face it, it's pretty awesome to make a good salary and still have 8 weeks off in the summer.  Booyah.

So last week my wise Father asked me what my summer plans were.  Perhaps you are thinking the same thing.  So, let's chat about my summer plans.

1.  Grad school.  I was going to take 3 grad school classes, but I ended up making the decision on the side of sanity and dropped the reading specialist practicum.  So, I'm taking a "Frameworks of Learning" course along with "Teaching Math in Elementary/Middle School."  I'm trying to just do a number of classes left countdown to December graduation.  Right now the magic number is 5.

2.  Work.  Wait...didn't I say I was done with work?  Yes.  HOWEVER, somehow I became a co-chair for two committee at my job, and so I have projects to do over the summer.  Luckily my fellow co-chair is a good friend, so doing departmental PR videos and developing an internship program will be uber fun.  I'll keep telling myself that...

3.  Travel.  I'm going on a mega-sisters-across-Missouri trip this weekend to Kansas City with my sister Katie.  I'm a little bummed that the health department in CoMo put the nix on the cicada ice cream, because I wanted to seriously try it!  I have no idea what we're going to do, but we have free hotel and gasoline to burn.  After that, I'm doing a solo road trip to Florida.  I'm excited to visit my Aunt and Uncle  and spend my days at the beach doing absolutely nothing but reading and sunning.

4.  Purging.  No, not vomiting.  Getting rid of "stuff" in my house.  I have way too much "stuff," and I need to get rid of some.  Look out goodwill, my CR-V might be full.

5.  Gardening.  I have a wicked awesome container garden going on.  So far, my lettuce and snow peas were successful, and I see baby tomatoes growing.  I'm hoping to also harvest peppers, carrots, parsley, and zucchini.  I probably forgot something...there are lots and lots of containers out on my patio!!

6.  B90.  I'm doing the Bible in 90 days challenge with a group of ladies, so every day I'll be reading and blogging about Bible.

I know these 8 weeks will go by very, very quickly, but I'm happy to get in my less stressed and relaxed groove.  I have a feeling the upcoming year with work is going to be extra busy, and I want to be ready to light the fire when work starts up again in August!  Happy Summer!

healing waters

Today is the feast day for Our Lady of Lourdes.  Is it a coincidence that today is also the day I decided for sure that I am going to Europe this summer...to visit Lourdes?  I don't think so.  The movie "Lourdes" that just so happened to be on EWTN when I was looking at the guide.  And even though it wasn't the most well-made flick ever and it was entirely subtitled, I cried and loved it.  I also stumbled up the movie "The Miracle of Our Lady of Fatima" complete on youtube.  Also amazing.  I cried, and I also found out it was nominated for an Oscar back in the day.  Anyway.

Water.

As you know, today was one week on the diet and detoxing from caffeine and soda.  I have only had water and milk in the past week.  It took a while to get used to it, but then I began to crave the water.  Well, today, as a reinforcer, I let myself eat chinese food for dinner with a regular coke.  Bad idea.  I knew I would feel sick, but I guess I just wanted to see if the food tasted as good when I wasn't craving it.  Well, it didn't.  In fact, I think I only ate about a quarter of my order before I was searching the house for a bottle of water.  And now I feel sickly and can't sleep because of the caffeine.  Wonderful.  So, drinking the water is helping to heal my body and make me physically healthier.

If simply drinking normal water can do this for my physically, what can the water of Lourdes do for me spiritually and emotionally (or even physically as well)?  I'm curious to know.





I'm still not sure why I feel like I should go on this pilgrimage.  I didn't even really know much about Fatima or Lourdes before researching it in the past two weeks.  But then again, that is how God works in me sometimes.  He puts something amazing on my heart or kicks me in the head.  But for some reason, I am feeling strongly called to go on this trip in June...and that is why I have decided to go.  Now, if only I could locate my passport...it's around here somewhere!

Although, I don't know why this should surprise me.  My devotion and relationship with Mary the Mother of God has deepened so much in the past year.  She is my spiritual Mother, and I ask her to pray for me more than ever before.  It really began with the women's retreat I went on last year at Our Sorrowful Mother's Ministry in Vandalia, Illinois, last year. 


Something really special happened at that retreat.  I feel that God spoke to me at that place and had two main messages.  The first one was:  fall before the Rosary.  Well, I had never really been that person who prayed the rosary daily.  I'd cycle through doing it for a week a couple times a year.  But here I am, about 10 months later, trying to pray the rosary daily, closer to Mary, and I own a small business designing and creating handmade rosaries!  I would have never guessed that in my wildest dreams!  And now I'm going to visit two of the most important Marian sites in the world?  What great plans does God have in store for me?  Why me?  Why such a little soul?  Who am I to even speak of Holy?  I'm just me.

bibliophile

I love to read. I find that I don't make enough time each day to read what I want to. And, starting next week, I will probably force myself to read textbooks instead of a great pick off of my to read list. Here's what I did in the late afternoon / early evening tonight.

And, yes, my hair looked that crazy. Laying in bed reading something that helps me become a better person with a pen or pencil in hand is one of my favorite activities.

This book is interesting, and if anything, it is a good review of information. I found myself chuckling at the parts teaching you how to "be a good listener." Sure sounded a lot like all the counseling classes I have taken in the past! Reflective statements, checking for understanding, empathy...oh yeah, baby.

On another lovely note, that trip to Europe that is heavy on my mind continues to poke at my heart saying: GO! JUST GO! I feel like that voice inside me, deep down, is screaming it: GOOO!

2010 Motto

Some people might think I'm weird. So be it. But sometimes I like to come up with mottoes for myself. I finally decided on my motto for 2010:

Live your life, not your job.

If you look at my track record the past couple of years, you would agree that this statement is not a reflection of my life. For the longest time, I thought my job was my life. Wrong. My job is my job. It is an important part of who I strive to be professionally and who I help with my gifts and education. But it should not be my life nor is it who I am.

So...about living my life. My precious life that God has provided me with for a time on earth should be lived to the fullest. Often, I don't listen to that voice, deep down, that tells me what I truly want to do with my spare time and dollars. Well, I'm considering changing that this year.

Remember in a previous post I spoke about making dating and relationships a priority? Well, I spoke with MOTF about it last night. I told her I didn't want to come off desperate, but that if I want to get married, I should keep that at the top of my to-do list. She all but told me "Finally!" Why the heck didn't she say something sooner?! So, yay.

I haven't been anywhere utterly amazing on a trip since November 1998. That's a while ago, folks! I visited Vienna, Austria, with my family and church choir. It was a wonderful experience. Here's my family in front of the town hall in the midst of the Christmas Market. Each window of the building becomes part of the Advent Calendar...pretty neat!

I really have a longing to visit the holy places of the world and soak in different cultures and scenery. I had thought about visiting family and friends this summer in the western part of the United States, but I'm considering changing my mind. I received this weekend the itinerary for my Aunt and Uncle in Colorado for the rest of the year. They are basically traveling the entire year, but maybe 20 days at home, total, for the entire summer. That probably won't work out... Then my darling sister calls me saying she wants to vacation with me this summer. Cool! I need a road trip buddy. I would prefer a boyfriend for the journey, but sisterly love is awesome, too! The snag: she wants to go to the beach...preferable Florida to visit my Aunt in Ft. Myers. Well, that would be fun, too. I suggested we take a trip to St. Augustine and Key West as well, but she didn't seem too thrilled with that. But those things seem a little "blah" still to me.

So I started thinking to myself, where do I really want to go? I knew the answer immediately. I have been longing to go on a pilgrimage to the Holy Land or Italy for a long time. Really, anywhere that has wonderfully holy places to visit with a spiritual edge along the journey is what I crave. So, I knew my friend Matthew had gone with OSMM to the Holy Land and had positive experiences. I went on retreat with OSMM last March - had an amazing time. So I got on the website...and my hopes were crushed. Just as I thought...the Holy Land trip is always the first 2 weeks of December - a time I probably cannot take off work if I want to keep my job. But to my amazement, there was a summer trip opportunity: Portugal, Spain, and France. It fits in my timeline for work, and it hits some amazing holy places with a priest as our main guide. It seems perfect. It also seems expensive, but when I look at my funds, I have the moolah for it.

I feel like I should just DO IT! How amazing would it be to visit Avila, Lourdes, Fatima, etc.... I'm sure it would be life changing and draw me closer to the Lord, which is the goal of any day.

I should just go. The fear of the unknown is holding me back, but I should just go.

Live life, not my job!